Supporting other people's goals

There are a lot of articles, tips, and tricks on accomplishing your own goals, but what about when someone you care about has a goal to set?  It should be important to you, if they're important to you, but regardless of how much you care about someone, you may be trying to sabotage them and not even know it!  Here is a quick guide for you to take a step back, assess the steps they're taking to reach a goal, and figure out how you can make that goal attainable.

1. DO NOT feel like they should make an exception for you! If they are taking care of business, and they are not neglecting you, stop trying to make them feel like you're the exception to the rule.  If they're dieting, don't tell them they should eat your cake because YOU made it.  Don't even offer it to them.  If they have a goal of sticking to a schedule, be it for training, school, or work, do not expect them to drop everything for you.   Make time elsewhere.

2. DO ask them about their goals and what you can do to help!  Accomplishing large tasks, regardless of how much determination a person has, can be extremely difficult, especially if they feel like they are alone.  Get involved.  Ask them what you can do.  A lot of the extremely high level athletes I know usually have something in common... a strong support system (ie, significant other, parents, siblings) that will help them with cooking meals, making sure they have the right equipment packed, and making sure they are staying on schedule.

3. DO NOT tell them you told them so when they fail, but also, do not sugar coat things. The one constant in trying to be great is failure.  It happens to everybody.  Be encouraging.  Help them evaluate their situation, and then help them draw a plan to overcome obstacles.  Sometimes, the biggest push a person needs to reach a goal is someone that they can trust honestly telling them they can do it.

4. DO remind them that there is life outside of their goals.  People can get engulfed in their work, regardless of what it is, believe me, I know. It's nice to have someone remind you that you're doing something because you love it, and not because it defines you.

Follow these steps, and you will definitely help that special someone be the best person they can be.

ATHLETES: this has to be a reciprocal relationship.  Your goals are YOUR goals, not everybody else's.  If someone is supporting you, support them back, and let them know you appreciate everything they do.

Coach Z